when the moon is a pie in the sky

I don't actually want to go to work! Do you know why? Because it is TWENTY TO SIX IN THE MORNING, that is why. The earth has not yet rotated into the correct position for the sun to be shining onto us!

When the urge takes me, I send cupiscent postcards with Hufflepuff fic written on them. This (the following) is one I wrote for her several months ago. I believe the postcard was an arty picture of vegetables:


Hannah reaches for the pumpkin, bypassing the spinach. "Ugh," she says, "I don't know why the house elves insist on giving us spinach. Nobody likes it."

"Hey!" protests Bones as she digs in, "I'll eat yours."

Smith sneers down the table. "Yeah, but you're a freak, Bones," he says, and fights with Summerby for the roast pork. Summerby tugs harder on the platter, and as he pulls Smith lets go, and the pork goes flying.

Hannah shuts her eyes; she doesn't want to know where it landed, but when it starts raining peas, she picks up the spinach (and hides the pumpkin) and joins in.

Hufflepuff loses thirty points, and it's worth every single one to see the look on Malfoy's face when he's wearing a wig of spinach.



SOMEONE WRITE ME COMMENT FIC PLS. Not necessarily HP. Any fandom will do.

KTHXBYE

YOUR GOD IS A NOTHING GOD

There was a pope named Constantine!

OH IF ONLY.